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Articles by rm_spedandpurple

rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
husband wanted   7/10/2005

Husband Wanted <br> A lonely spinster, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married. <br> She put an ad in the local paper that read: "HUSBAND WANTED, MUST BE IN MY AGE GRO


0 Comments, 333 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Confucious says:   7/9/2005

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day. Man who stand on toilet high on pot. It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy. to park meat in girl. Man who jizz in cash re


0 Comments, 203 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Clarification of corporate lingo   7/9/2005

Employer's Lingo: <br> "COMPETITIVE SALARY! We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors. <br> "JOIN OUR FAST-PACED TEAM! We have no time to train you. <


0 Comments, 148 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
anniversary   7/9/2005

Sam and Becky are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. Sam says to Becky, "Becky, I was wondering - have you ever cheated on me?" Becky replies, "Oh Sam, why would you ask such a question no


0 Comments, 231 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
texas short skirt   7/9/2005

In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful young woman was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini Skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. . <br&g


0 Comments, 242 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Bill Gates   7/9/2005

Bill Gates is laying at the beach and reads the news paper. Suddenly he discovers a bottle in the sea. He takes it and opens it. <br> A ghost appears and says: "I have been trapped for 1


0 Comments, 183 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Priest and a Mars   7/9/2005

A catholic priest was summoned to the Vatican for a three week meeting. Unfortunately, the only substitute available was a young priest with no experience whatsoever. <br> "I feel up to t


0 Comments, 146 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
marriage fantasizing   7/9/2005

According to the latest surveys, when making love, most married men fantasize that their wives aren't fantasizing.


0 Comments, 143 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
can doctors be replaced?   7/6/2005

One day, Pete complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quic


0 Comments, 416 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Ethel   7/6/2005

Two women were talking about their lives since they had become Nursing home residents. <br> They both agreed that life was good but one woman, Ethel, said she was rather upset because her


0 Comments, 208 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
pierre the pilot   7/6/2005

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day, and love is in the air. Marie leans over to Pierre and


0 Comments, 201 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
3 chinese punishments   7/6/2005

a guy got seperated from civilization one day and was stranded in a forest for 3 months. One day came on to this big house in the middle of the forest. Not thinking why a house was there he ran up


0 Comments, 198 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
sunday school nun   7/6/2005

a nun is teaching a sunday school class and asks" what all the boys and girls want to be when they grow up"?one boy says"a doctor" one girl says"a lawyer" but this one girl says"a ' the nun stops


0 Comments, 252 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
Peace Corps   7/6/2005

Once there was a young man that decided to join the Peace Corps. When he finished his training, he was assigned to work with a tribe in Africa. His instructor said to him, "When you're living with


0 Comments, 318 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
top ten things not to do on your anniversary!   7/5/2005

TEN TOP THINGS NOT TO SAY ON YOUR ANNIVERSARY <br> 10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking. <br> 9. Today is our what? <br> 8. Ok


0 Comments, 197 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
idiot's guide to sex   7/5/2005

IDIOT'S SEX GUIDE <br> 1. Eating Mexican food is not the cause of gonorrhea. <br> 2. There is no need for dice in role playing. <br> 3. Intercourse doesn't happen on a hi


0 Comments, 217 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
code word for sex   7/5/2005

A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter. <br> <br> One


0 Comments, 154 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
that's love!!   7/5/2005

THAT'S LOVE! <br> An escaped convict, imprisoned for 1st degree murder, had spent 25 years of his life sentence in prison. While on the run, he broke into a house and tied up a young coup


0 Comments, 290 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
sperm bank robbery   7/5/2005

SPERM BANK ROBBERY <br> A man wearing a balaclava bursts into a sperm bank with a shot gun. "Open the f*****g safe!" he yells at the girl behind the counter. "But we're not a real bank" r


0 Comments, 257 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
"the bf's "   7/3/2005

My boyfriend and I live together. He has an eleven year old that doesnt. Sounds simple enough heh? Well it's not!!!! One of the weekends he had her, we were in our bedroom, thinking she was asleep


0 Comments, 705 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
three women   7/2/2005

Good evening ladies", Sherlock Holmes said as he passed three women eating bananas on a park bench. <br> "Do you know them?" Dr. Watson asked. <br> "No", Holmes replied, "I've ne


0 Comments, 141 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
none   7/2/2005

A Kiwi guy decides to travel around the Greek Islands. <br> He walks into a bar and Jill (the Kiwi Barmaid) takes his order, a Speights, and notices his accent. <br> Over the cours


0 Comments, 123 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
just reading   7/2/2005

A married couple is lying in bed one night. <br> The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. <br> As he's reading, he period


0 Comments, 141 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
dont lie to your mother   7/2/2005

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his ro


0 Comments, 321 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
OMG IS ALL IMMA SAY   7/2/2005

There was a man who had a problem getting an erection so he goes to the doctor. <br> The doctor takes all kinds of tests and finally decides that he can cure the man. <br> The d


0 Comments, 153 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
gimme an honest answer   7/2/2005

I'm not gonna lie...i just want to know this for my own selfish reasons...but ....here goes <br> How many of you guys would honestly see a woman that gave it up on the first da


0 Comments, 991 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
dirty deaf jokes   7/2/2005

Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights because they can't see each other using si


0 Comments, 242 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
sex on the beach   7/2/2005

A guy is walking along the beach, when he meets a girl with no legs, crying. "Why are you crying?" he asks. <br> "I've never been hugged, " she says. The guy hugs her, but she continues


0 Comments, 230 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
this one's for the married women   7/2/2005

Q. Why are married women heavier than single women? A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.


0 Comments, 210 Views, 0 Votes
rm_spedandpurple 52,1943 C
23  Articles
foreplay...men dont get offended   7/2/2005

Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay? A. They don't have time.


0 Comments, 216 Views, 0 Votes